Sunday, August 15, 2010

Quotes from the pulpit....

  • "You know Jim Morrison? He was the lead singer of the Doors."
  • "It's important to eat your food storage. If you have a 50 gallon barrel of wheat in the basement and only eat it during an emergency you'll be worse off than a rattlesnake in a wagon rut."
  • "Make sure you have a safe room because who knows what might float over from Tooele."
  • "You have to be prepared for everything -- tsunamis, floods, volcanoes."
  • "If Yellowstone blows we're all goners."
  • "Goats are dumb and sheep are even stupider."
  • "Bread and toilet paper. They're the staples of life. You take from that what you want."
You know when the stake president is on the stand to visit and the speaker starts out his talk quoting a song from the Doors it's gonna mean one thing -- Best high council talk EVER!

4 comments:

  1. HILARIOUS!!! I wish I'd been at your ward this week!!! Maybe I should take notes like yours during all meetings! Those would be notes worth re-reading!

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  2. Oh my gosh...I was just laughing out freaking loud. "Who knows what might float over from Tooele." BAAHHH-HHAA-HA! I have to kind of agree with the bread and toilet paper thing, but I wouldn't say it from the pulpit.

    Two weeks ago, Elle gave a talk about her trek experience. She said..and I quote "One of our leaders had hemorrohid medicine, and you might not know this, but it not only helps hemorrohids stop itching, it stops bug bites from itching, too."

    You can forgive a kid for mentioning hemorrohid's from the pulpit, but how do you explain the adults??

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  3. Sounds way better than the High Council talk we heard lately -- he proceeded to touch the political party issues AND the "utah mormon" thing. Matt and I wanted to say "where is your mouth filter?"
    Hmmmm.

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